Happy New Year and welcome a possible resolution for the days ahead as we consider the myriad benefits of synthetic ice rinks. More and more municipalities are tired of using huge amounts of electricity to freeze precious drinking water into a medium for general bumbling around and sloppy spins of weekend Olympians largely immune from a truncheon to the shins from a competitor’s henchman.

Instead of ice rinks, cities are opting for ones with polyethylene sheets. They're just as smooth and slippery as their solid water counterparts but much cheaper to run. Of course, some at the WWF may grumble about microplastics produced during abrasion, but we won’t let such post-holiday humbug bring us down. We’d rather strap on our skates, hit the resin, and croon happily in the manner of Gene Kelly: I'm singing on PE….